Someone take some goddamn initiative!
I’m sick and tired of the humans making such a big deal about the prisoner abuse in Iraq. Yeah, I know everyone has already stopped talking about this, but you know what? I haven’t. I’ll tell you what I think of all this mess– I think it was a half assed job of abuse blown completely out of proportion by the Communist American media. I have a friend who is a tank over in Baghdad, and he is thoroughly embarrassed by this whole ordeal. He knows like I know, that if you want something done right, especially torturing humans, you have to have a robot do it. If I was there in Abu-Garib, you would have seen some wild shit. No seriously, I would have taken camel feces from out in the desert and made those humans eat it. But here’s the best part: I would have convinced the Army to let me, Blackbot, go into the prison under the premise that since I’m a robot and mechanically superior, I can get all the information they need. Once there, I would commence some serious thrashing of both the U.S. troops and their prisoners, until they were all held in cells. You can’t imagine the photos I would send back. I mean body parts everywhere, just carnage, simple and plain. Don’t step on that head Mr. Powell! Hey Rumsfeld, watch out for that box of ears! Ya heard me? So let’s stop pussyfooting around this issue– those soldiers missed a grand opportunity for some real human torturing, instead opting out for beginner’s stuff like naked body piles and laughing at penises. They must have purchased the “My First Torture Book” Dr. Science wrote back in the early 1700’s. Peace out critics!
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