DESCRIPTION DINOSAUR
Sarah: A rich whore with fake breasts and aging human skin, Sarah made it clear within the show’s first fifteen minutes that she was a self-absorbed, oversexed idiot lacking in tact. For an insider secret, I asked a friend who is a cash register at her old school, Emory University, and he informed me that Sarah once blew the pasta chef in order to receive extra sun dried tomatoes on her plate.
Willie: This aptly named flamboyant homosexual from Manhattan spent part of his first hours in the house searching for local gay bars, no doubt to engage in promiscuous sex.
M.J.: A tall, curly haired Southern idiot with a penchant for talking about himself. Human girls enjoy his brash confidence and height, and therefore are willing to deal with his intensely small penis.
Landon: A shorter, brown haired version of M.J. from Wisconsin.
Karamo: MTV's big black twist, Karamo is actually gay despite his "hip-hop" looks. Gay man number two! Yeah MTV!
Shavonda: A black girl with a hideously ugly white boyfriend, 'Vonda probably won’t play a major role on the show unless she cheats on him.
Quiet Girl: Quiet Girl is so boring that she doesn't even deserve her own name. Look for her in arguments and not much else.
29% of Americans are homosexual
50% of American men are gay
67% of minorities are gay, including 100% of male minorities
33% of women are whores
100% of white men are athletic, have similar bone structure, and curly hair
50% of white women and 33% of all women have fake breasts
50% of white women have been raped
100% of white women that have been raped have also had an eating disorder
100% of black women like white men better than black men, preferably ugly white men
43% of Americans are minorities, made up of 29% African-Americans and 14% Latinos. Asians do not exist.
So that sums it up for America. It's a colorful and gay country full of obnoxious, self-absorbed humans who all wish they were on television. I impatiently await the first robot to be cast.
